Why every mom needs a village and what to do when she doesn’t have one

Being a mom is one of the toughest jobs out there. It is full of sleepless nights and praying that you get to finish your coffee before it gets cold.  Mothers often forget about doing anything for themselves and before they know it, they are living their life for the people they created. It can be stressful and even exhausting at times.  Mothers often do not get breaks and thus can become cranky people even when they mean to be nice and welcoming. It comes a time when a mom needs others to step in and give her a break. Every mom needs a village. If she doesn’t have family then a village of friends  and/or hired help is just as wonderful. It is important for moms to be able to relax for some time without having to worry about anyone but herself. Moms need to be able to take a shower in peace or even go to Target (the best place ever!) without kids in tow. Many mothers feel burnout when they do not have the support system of a village.  Moms who have a village will tell you how beneficial a village is to their mental well-being and how it even helps them be better mothers.
Stressed mothers are more likely to yell and have less patience with their children. They are also more likely to be less involved and even detached from their children because they are craving to have any moment of peace. They are trying to save their mental health. Moms need to be able to practice self-care at least every week to be able to give all they can to their children. As the saying goes you cannot give what you do not have and you cannot pour from an empty cup.
So what is a mom to do if she doesn’t have people that she can call her village? What is a mom to do when she is the only person she can lean on? The answer seems simple but it really isn’t. I will provide a few tips on how to be able to get some time to self-care even if it is 30 mins a day. If you do not have a village consider putting your children to sleep earlier so that you can have some time to relax and breathe without worrying about what is next on your to-do list. The next option is looking into hiring a mother’s helper or babysitter for a few hours a week so that you can enjoy some time alone to do things that you wouldn’t be able to with the kids around, say like going to the gym or for drinks with your girlfriends. Waking up early, before your children wake up is another way to get some self care in your routine. Waking up earlier will allow you to prepare yourself for your day without interruptions or having to rush.  Drink your coffee or tea before the kids wake up is also massively helpful in reducing the stress the day might bring.  Being a mom is hard and having a village is a great asset. If you do not have a village then please try some of the suggestions and see what works for you. Your children need you to be at your best so that you can be the best mommy for them. Try everyday to put yourself and mental health first so that your children can have a happy and healthy mother.


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