parenting · personal

I am going to sip tea tonight, very slowly

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This week has been incredibly difficult. My 8 month old has a horrible cold. I don’t understand how she got sick. She literally woke up sick. No one in the house was sick so it doesn’t make much sense. She is miserable, which in turn makes me miserable and not because I am tired. It makes me miserable because I cannot fix her as fast as I would like to. I cannot take her cold away. If I could, I would absorb every ounce of illness in her and be sick instead. This is why I will sip my tea slow tonight. She is going to wake up soon, she is going to be crying and looking for me to help her immediately. I won’t get any sleep and I’m looking forward to it. I will sip my tea until she wakes up so that I won’t be delayed in getting to her, I will be right on cue the moment her eyes open. I will cradle her and take the mucous out of her nose and then feed her. This takes longer than ever now but it’s okay because once I am done, she can continue to rest until she needs me again. Once my tea is finished and my baby is sleep for some time, I will lay down and rest and get ready to do it in the morning red eyed and tired  but it makes my day to make her happy even when she feels icky.  I probably should drink coffee instead but I never liked the way it tastes, so tea, honey and sugar will be my buddy tonight.

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